You'd rather negotiate with terrorist than the organist
A church picnic is no picnic
You've ever wanted to fire the church and form a congregational search committee
You've ever wanted to give the sound tech some feedback of your own
You've ever wanted to lay hands on a deacon and you weren't thinking about praying for him
You often feel like you're herding mules rather than shepherding sheep
You've wanted to use the children's message to send a message to the congregation
You've wanted to announce your vacation with the words "Hasta la Vista, Baby!"
You've love a shock device to use to wake sleeping ushers
You've wanted to impeach the congregational president
From Adventures in Preaching